New Pandemic
5 posters
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New Pandemic
The next pandemic
I went to a dinner party last night, where I and other guests enjoyed copious amounts of alcohol.
I awoke this morning not feeling well, with what could be described as flu-like symptoms; headache, nausea, chills, sore eyes, etc.
From the results of some initial testing, I have unfortunately tested positive for what experts are now calling Wine Flu.
This debilitating condition is very serious - and it appears this is not an isolated case.
Reports are flooding in from all around the country of others diagnosed with Wine Flu. To anyone that starts to exhibit the aforementioned tell-tale signs, experts are recommending a cup of tea and a bit of a lie down.
However, should your condition worsen, you should immediately rent a DVD and take some Advil . Others are reporting a McDonald's Happy Meal can also help in some cases. If not, then further application of the original liquid, in similar quantities to the original dose, has been shown to do the trick.
Wine Flu does not need to be life threatening and, if treated early, can be eradicated within a 24-48 hour period.
NOTE
If you find you are complaining a lot, it may be that it has mutated into Whine Flu. This is particularly common in men and can quickly spread to their partners where the symptoms are detected as a serious case of eye-rolling.
I went to a dinner party last night, where I and other guests enjoyed copious amounts of alcohol.
I awoke this morning not feeling well, with what could be described as flu-like symptoms; headache, nausea, chills, sore eyes, etc.
From the results of some initial testing, I have unfortunately tested positive for what experts are now calling Wine Flu.
This debilitating condition is very serious - and it appears this is not an isolated case.
Reports are flooding in from all around the country of others diagnosed with Wine Flu. To anyone that starts to exhibit the aforementioned tell-tale signs, experts are recommending a cup of tea and a bit of a lie down.
However, should your condition worsen, you should immediately rent a DVD and take some Advil . Others are reporting a McDonald's Happy Meal can also help in some cases. If not, then further application of the original liquid, in similar quantities to the original dose, has been shown to do the trick.
Wine Flu does not need to be life threatening and, if treated early, can be eradicated within a 24-48 hour period.
NOTE
If you find you are complaining a lot, it may be that it has mutated into Whine Flu. This is particularly common in men and can quickly spread to their partners where the symptoms are detected as a serious case of eye-rolling.
cat- Major Leaguer
- Number of posts : 1598
Location : State of Confusion
Registration date : 2008-05-24
Re: New Pandemic
Seems I get this bug every weekend... where can I sign up for inoculation?
Ehwmatt- Major Leaguer
- Number of posts : 1047
Registration date : 2009-03-02
Re: New Pandemic
Whine Flu? Reminds me a bit of Man Colds https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rXLHWmjA5IE&feature=related
SilverBlack- Minor Leaguer
- Number of posts : 375
Age : 52
Registration date : 2009-02-28
cat- Major Leaguer
- Number of posts : 1598
Location : State of Confusion
Registration date : 2008-05-24
Re: New Pandemic
I had H1N1 this morning. Heineken 16 No sleep till 1am
Ed- Hall of Famer
- Number of posts : 5243
Registration date : 2008-05-26
Re: New Pandemic
Ed wrote:I had H1N1 this morning. Heineken 16 No sleep till 1am
...gonna have that all weekend as I'm making the trek to Happy Valley to see Penn State play Indiana. Gonna be totally out of control.
Saint John- Major Leaguer
- Number of posts : 2075
Registration date : 2008-05-23
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